Legs, Subways and Doofus Awards

Today was fraught with horrible thoughts on my part. On the way to the subway, I picked up my usual free copy of the Metro. Today there were two stories I found particularly disturbing. The first involved a woman in Long Island hearing two thumps in the morning and returning from work to find that someone's right leg complete with socks and Adidas sneaker, as well as half a torso and part of the spine somehow fell down from the sky and crashed into the side of her house. Yes, very disgusting.
The second story I read was about a woman who got raped in the subway last night. Apparently the person who worked in the booth heard a scream but didn't investigate. One of the people driving the cars noticed what looked like a man assaulting a woman and called it in. Needless to say, by then, the deed had already been done. So me with my horrifically vivid imagination thought about how I would react if someone tried to rape me. The phrase, "You're frickin' kidding me," always seems to be the first words out of my mouth before I try to get away. I really need some form of self defense. It seems too easy for some guy to just grab me unsuspecting off the street - but then, I'm usually safely at home before the rapists start their evening lurk.
On a brighter note, Nestor sent me a most amusing email today. Apparently the company portfolios that we were busy making all last week made quite a splash over in Missouri. We won the Preferred Doofus Award for Outstanding Achievement. It involves the award for best cover, best use of color, fine fonts and most appealing and readable page layout, best use of photographs (aka "Pretty pictures: they made me drool"), technical excellence for special achievement in binding and paper quality, and lastly the highest rating awarded in the category of "Attention to Detail and Demonstrated Subtlety and Self-Restraint in Marketing." I think basically the librarians of Columbia, Missouri were telling us we went far above and beyond the norm for portfolio quality. We aim to please. ^_^