You are the jelly of my sandwich. I luv food.
Yeah, so today's been really depressing, not just for me, but for a lot and lot of other people. So much so that the dance team choreographer decided we all needed cheering up and took us to go buy ice cream. Rum raisin...yumm.
But hey, let's discuss why I'm so depressed. Let's start with waking up - I almost couldn't because I was in such a frenzy to finish making all my presents that I didn't sleep until 1:30 last night, which is really really late for me. So then I go to school and everything's fine first period, but second period came and that's where my true hell began. So I went to my 3D design teacher, who's been helping me with my portfolio. She's already said that my pieces weren't very good. So she asked me how my interview went yesterday, and at first I thought it went well, but describing it made me realize that I didn't have much to offer college, and my work is most certainly unimpressive. Basically, I botched it all. So I go over to another art teacher because my teacher wanted me to meet with him so that he could critique and help me with the portfolio. So right off he tells me to scrap it all and start from nothing. And then I go back and am told by my teacher that I basically have the art skills of an eighth grader. And basically anything artistic that I've ever devoted time to, save drawing, has all been a waste of time. Nevermind that I've won prizes for my poetry. That's not what they're looking for. Never mind that I could probably turn out some good stuff given half a chance to actually take a class. Great...I'm definitely never getting into any of my colleges then. And then around the middle of fifth period, I found out that I missed the all state cut-off by only 1 or 2 points - yet again. Just like missing National Merit Semifinalist by -hm, guess what, 1 point, and how I probably missed a 1600 on my SATs by - oo, 1 question. Great, just great. And then I also find out the great indignity of the fact that I didn't actually improve in the ranks of western regions, in fact, I moved backwards. Moving on, my friend and I are going to get food when we bump into my other good buddy who's huddled on the ground - and he has his depressing issues too. And being in a foul mood already, listening to his just made me wanna cry like I did second period today. And then when I go to give everyone their presents at dance team, I actually do burst into tears. Isn't that just wonderful? Getting a gift form a crying idiot? Then, to top it all off, I go home and mom basically tells me that my artwork can't cut it and I should just give up and focus on the engineering aspect of architecture. Thanks mom, how fucking unencouraging.

You are the filling of my twinkie. Mmmmm, twinkies. My friend had one the other day, and I now have a major craving. As you can see, I haven't updated in a long time, in fact, I haven't even been on the computer since...a long time ago. Why? I've been busy burning out my brain cells. No, I have not been drinking. I've been busting my brains over colleges. I've been trying slavishly to develop a credible architectural portfolio. Several problems - 1) I never took an art class 2) My artwork is pure crap 3) I'm severely lacking in imagination. And what's worse, the disappointed sounds that come out of my 3D design teacher when she looks over what I have doesn't particularly help. So with that crappy portfolio, I'm most likely not going to get into 4 of the colleges I'm applying to, and the others are more than a little iffy. And then there's the interview coming up on Wednesday, which I'm VERY VERY worried about. I'd be glad if I made it into one college, that's all I'm asking for. Darn it, why couldn't I just enjoy doing what I'm good at?

You are the hole of my donut. That's a wierd one, but I like it. I had a wonderful Thanksgiving, did you have a wonderful Thanksgiving? I had chicken (no turkey for me, thanks), stuffing, ziti, sparkling burgundy (non-alcoholic, mind you) and all sorts of other yummy things. And the whole family was there too! It was really great!